Don’t bother telling me anything if you don’t mean it. It might seem like a double standard but I was up front with you about it and I actually stopped talking to her… But then again, there’s nothing. I have no right to say anything. just don’t bring my hopes up.
This is probably a bad decision. I should probably think this through. this will probably make me worse. But you know what? I don’t care. I’m thinking about right now! And rn I want this! I want this so badly even if I get hurt or am really sad afterwards. But I’m loving it rn. It’s fucked up. It I’m happy.
Manhattanville campus is beautiful! Road trip was rad and exploring the city with jay was fun.
And I saw Noah today! 😻 I missed my sugar daddy ahaha.
Anyways, I seriously have such great friends. and Alex, Nicky k, Anthony,Nic and maybe Noah said they would visit me!! ☺️ I’m excited.
I am not as sad or upset as people think I am.
Relationships sometimes don’t work out.
There are bad days but also great days!
People DO care.
I’m not the person I aim to be yet…
But I’m trying. I will slowly get there. Cutting old habits are the worst. Saying goodbye is sad, but I will be okay.
Sooo…I came out to two of my friends today. it actually felt really good and they were beyond accepting. I usually get negative comments and questions but it was good this time. ☺️☺️☺️
My friends are so lovely.
Ps: if you know me from school, Fuck off and don’t pester me with questions or comments. Thank you.
this past week/weekend was awful. I guess I’m still processing everything that happened and I’m so grateful to have the help of my friends to get through this. honestly, I don’t know how I would be right now, without them. thank you, Alex, Arie, jay, Jess, and nicho.
And tbh, in a way I’m kinda relieved this happened, just not the way it happened
my birthday was alright. I really liked the scavenger hunt that Ben made me. it had a lot of last minute changes but that’s okay, that made it even better. it just would’ve been better if Hood rat were here.
then I found out that I didn’t get the spot to be counselor, I mean that’s alright. I missed too many days and now I can spend more time with hood rat but “school politics” is the dumbest reason to reject me. you two are the biggest assholes I have ever met. you’re so fucking shady but that’s alright. karma, man. just you wait.
I also found out that you find me annoying. you honestly pms more than I do. you think I’m annoying? Really? I haven’t even spoken to you in sooo long. I actually care if you’re okay or not but fuck you. Don’t you dare wish me a happy birthday when you don’t actually care or mean it. go annoy the rest of your friends. And don’t worry about the party. I can do that some other time. thank you for not remembering my birthday until the last minute. Same thing with the both of you! I was always a good friend to you and actually gave you gifts that I knew you would like. Again, Karma’s a bitch, just you wait. Thanks “friends”. but thank you so much Ben, Alex, Lindsey, Tafi, Teresa, Jess and everyone else involved. I actually had fun even though everyone found out about an incident at Thai ahaha ohmygod the embarrassment.
I don’t know what it is with people and screwing me over.
I’m sorry that I’m such a nuisance and annoying. But don’t cast me out.
I miss my best friend and sucks that he’s states away. I miss my friend group that I use to have and how much fun we had. nothing feels the same now.
Why is it when I finally feel like everything is starting to go right things suddenly Get worse. when I finally feel like I’m getting close to someone again, They just leave me? I dunno, Maybe in just over reacting but I’m getting so tired of it…